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09 June 2003 @ 01:19 am
I would like to sing a song of great social and political import.  
Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz....or a computer that doesn't suck so very, very much. I admit, buying a computer due to the 'Ooh! Look! It's purple!' thought process was probably not the best choice I could have made...but does it have to be so very, very bad? *growls at computer*

In other news: I want to own the new Jack Johnson cd. A lot.

And I love Sports Night. I bought the collector's set DVD as a celebration of my first paycheck. By the way, I heart having money. ANY-way, Casey and Danny from Sports Night (why was that show canceled for the love of God? It was so goddamned *good*!) are even slashier than Clark and Lex. Amazing.


So -- I love feedback. I love everyone who has given me feedback. I want to buy all of you puppies. Fuzzy ones. I had forgotten how nice feedback is because, you know, I wasn't writing for a while. What with the utter chaos that was The Big Giant Goddamned Boring Paper and moving, and starting work, I had no time. But now I have time to you know, breathe, and all. So I'm psyched to get back to writing. Finishing WiPs is fun. I plan to do it more often.

Speaking of WiPs...I started a Clex AU. Sort of. What if Lionel had found Lex a punishment that was closer to home and never sent him to Smallville? Clark would have met later, when Clark was at Met U...and how would that have gone? It's not the world's most original idea, but I'm having fun with it. In the world of Nifra, Clark meets Lex as an intern in Lex's private offices.



In the past three days he had not only managed to break the coffee machine in the staff kitchen, spill water on not one but two different important files, give out wrong information and freeze his computer at least daily, but he’d also put Lionel Luthor through to the plant in Smallville instead patching him to his son. That had been ten minutes ago.

After realizing what he’d just done, Clark had quietly flipped out at his desk for a full three minutes before deciding that he’d probably be better off if he left the scene of the crime. He’d briefly toyed with the idea running off to a cave in Fiji and living off of the land for the rest of his natural life, but had decided on going to the men’s room instead. Seven minutes later, he was still in the men’s room, hiding.

“You,” he said to his reflection in the mirror, “are such a twelve year old girl. You’re hiding in the bathroom, Clark! The bathroom! Nobody hides in the bathroom unless they’ve got a double ‘x’ chromosome!”

“So what if you suck at your job and you’re going to get fired?” Clark continued, pointing at his image. “You should at least go out there and take it like a man. No more of this bathroom bullshit, and Fiji is out too. Sure, the cave sounds like a good idea now, but wait until the monsoon season when you get flooded. Then you’ll *really* miss the apartment you aren’t going to be able to afford when Lex Luthor fires your sorry ass for putting his dad through to the crap factory….”

Clark shook his head at himself. “And could you be any lamer? And now you’re standing here in the bathroom, talking to yourself. Yeah, you’ve completely lost it, Kent. So you’re going to go out there, and you’re going to sit at that desk, and you’re going to … I don’t know. But you’re going to go back out there. And that’s all there is to it.”

“Pretty rudimentary plan,” a smooth, amused voice commented. “Me, I’d pick Fiji any day.”

Clark whirled quickly, almost *too* quickly, and mentally chalked that slip up to yet another way in which he’d messed up today. Lex Luthor stood by the door, arms crossed and a smile tugging at his lips. He didn’t look pissed off. Or maybe he did. Clark couldn’t tell.

Either way, Clark’s desire to leave the bathroom had just escalated to need. He could feel the wash of crimson rising over his throat, up into his cheeks and did he really *have* to blush so noticeably? “Mr. Luthor, I didn’t know you were here, I…I’m just going to, uhm –”

“Go back out to your desk,” Lex finished, giving into the impulse to smile. “And then I’m supposed to go out there, and fire you, am I right?”

“Uhm…I…that’s up to you, sir,” he said, drawing himself up straighter.

Lex nodded, leaning against the sink with his hands in his pockets, and thought for a moment. “Should I humiliate you when I fire you?”

His teeth were very white. They looked sharp. Clark wasn’t sure how to answer the question. “I would prefer it if you didn’t?” he managed.

“Fair enough,” Lex replied. “Now, tell me, Clark Kent…why am I firing you?”

Because I’m incompetent? Clark thought, but wisely bit the words back. “The…incident. With your father. On the phone. With the…fertilizer plant.”

“Ahh, yes. You put him through to the plant in Smallville.” Lex looked down at his shoes.

Clark held his breath, readying himself for some kind of stinging set down. He’d heard that Lex Luthor could cut someone to bits with a well worded sentence, and Clark was sure he was about to experience it first hand. That is, he was sure until he noticed Lex’s shoulders shaking.

“You put him through to the plant…‘the crap factory’…” Lex repeated, and Clark realized he was laughing. Rather hard, actually. And Clark began to breathe again.

“God,” Lex threw his head back, laughing out loud. “I’m going to start insisting that every time the old bastard calls to yank my chain he’s connected to the ‘crap factory.’”

“Mr. Luthor?” Clark asked, hesitant.

“Please, you’re the first person in weeks who’s made me laugh this hard. Call me Lex.” His cool blue eyes danced with merriment as he studied Clark. “Don’t worry, Clark, I’m not going to fire you. You make life interesting.”

Clark could feel his eyes widening and his jaw beginning to drop. He managed to stop it before it dropped all the way open, because that would be very uncool. “Thank you, sir…Lex, I mean. Thanks, Lex.”

“Don’t mention it,” Lex said, opening the door to the bathroom, before pausing and turning back to Clark. “I hope you don’t run off to Fiji any time soon. Or if you do, let me know. Fiji’s fun this time of year.”
 
 
Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: Sugar Coated - Aimee Mann
 
 
 
Beanbarely_bean on June 8th, 2003 11:10 pm (UTC)
write more! now!
Celli: monkeycelli on June 8th, 2003 11:11 pm (UTC)
*dies laughing*

darlin', prepared to be stalked. I *must* know what happens next.
Caseyedgecity on June 9th, 2003 12:05 am (UTC)
Oh, I love this AU! I may be forced to borrow it so that I can write in it some day. Seriously, this was great. Loving insecure!Clark and laughing!Lex. Not to mention the flirting... excellent job. Keep up the good work!
(Anonymous) on June 9th, 2003 03:59 am (UTC)
Hah! This is fantastic! *also dies laughing* You so, so need to write more of this. Now!

~Alexa
Adoable Frunklyra_sena on June 9th, 2003 07:49 am (UTC)
Lol! Look up there! Your first stalker! YAY! *G*

You're such a tease...now I'm going to have to ride your ass to get at least the first 3 chapters written before I leave for Ireland on holiday. (where I shall suffer beta!withdrawal)

*hugs* babe. You're an amazing and versatile writer. I won't launch into my usual endless babble of fawnage. Just, y'know. You rock.

Also, *kicks Nifra's computer*. (umm, make that a *gentle* kick). Bad computer! Bad! Don't forget...You Are Replaceable! *G*


Giyenah: killer plot bunnygiyenah on June 9th, 2003 09:51 pm (UTC)
"Nobody hides in the bathroom unless they’ve got a double ‘x’ chromosome!”

Bwah! You crack me up. And add another notch on your stalker list. *g*
Michelleaesvir on June 12th, 2003 05:16 pm (UTC)
Wonderful stuff! I'm going to drown myself in alcohol if there aren't sequels.
lastscorpion on June 13th, 2003 02:47 pm (UTC)
Hoody Hoo! This is funny and cool!
Dolimirdolimir_k on June 14th, 2003 09:26 pm (UTC)
Hello. I just found your lj and am going back and reading past entries. Welcome to a wonderfully addictive world.

Anyway, I gotta say...Clark is so very adorkable here.

Hope you write more!
mister perceptive pirate pantsahab99 on June 20th, 2003 08:35 am (UTC)
And I love Sports Night. I bought the collector's set DVD as a celebration of my first paycheck. By the way, I heart having money. ANY-way, Casey and Danny from Sports Night (why was that show canceled for the love of God? It was so goddamned *good*!) are even slashier than Clark and Lex. Amazing.

There's something about the slash combined with the really good Sorkin writing that makes it sooo good! I just watched this show for the first time 2 weeks ago and I'm addicted. I just got myself the DVDs too, and I'm working my way through the second season. :)