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07 January 2005 @ 02:42 am
Worst Orc Ever  
Okay, Worst Orc Ever award goes the the pink faced catty-looking one with one-eye in Return of the King. This is not to say taht I don't think he's good at being an orc; you know, I guess he probably kills things as well as one might expect, and he certainly seems to enjoy being gross and weird and malevolent.

But, really, looking at him makes me shudder and make assorted noises of disgust. Then again, I don't really like the one with the hat that looks like the leaning tower of Pisa if the leaning tower of Pisa had a huge skull stuck to the top of it either.

Also, his voice kind of bothers me. It's very -- it's like that voice you do to scare small children, and it tickles the back of your throat. That may not make sense to anyone who is not me.

But yeah, man. Dear Cat-Pink-Orc-Face, I totally hate you, please die in a freak magma incident. No love, Me.
 
 
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suzycatsuzycat on January 7th, 2005 10:28 am (UTC)
He is also my most powerfully disliked orc.
pure FORESHADOWING: get yr RIFT ON! - slodnifra_idril on January 8th, 2005 01:33 am (UTC)
We should form a coalition or something. *nods firmly*
.hackthis on January 7th, 2005 05:13 pm (UTC)
He's just so gross looking, it's like, yuck.
pure FORESHADOWING: absolut!nifra_idril on January 8th, 2005 01:32 am (UTC)
Dude. Fo'real. I mean -- with the bumpy pink face and the sparse whiskers, and the weird "My head is Way TOO SMALL for my body business". Gross. Gross. Gross. Yeck.
obsessive-compulsive squirrelacari on January 8th, 2005 12:28 am (UTC)
Hi, here via f-list swap with svmadelyn. She specifically mentioned you so I had to check out your LJ, of course. But, aw, you don't like potatoe head? He is my favouritest orc ever.
pure FORESHADOWING: LexCorp Legal Dept.nifra_idril on January 8th, 2005 01:31 am (UTC)
Heh! Hi there!

Yeah, I've gotta tell you - I've got a massive hate-on for that guy, fo'serious. There's something about his weird catty face that looks like he was boiled as a kitten/orc-let, which makes me more than a little uncomfortable. I mean, I am just not down with boiling kittens, no matter what other strange and terrible things I may, occasionally, endorse.

But, thinking of him as Mr. Potato-Head does make it somewhat better. Then I can think of the misshapen lumps on his head as eyes, rather than scar tissue left over from you know, being boiled.

*ponders* This may now bump up Mr. "My Hat Was Once a Head!" to Worst Orc Ever. Or maybe the weird one that gets vivisected and then chases Merry and Pippin into the wood of the Ents. Yeah, his face wasn't my favorite, that's for sure.

I -- may be way too dorky for words.
obsessive-compulsive squirrelacari on January 8th, 2005 02:03 am (UTC)
Your theory explains a lot. I'd be grumpy, too, if someone had boiled me as a kidlet. Well, apart from being a mishappen lump of orc meat in general.

But I really hate the leader of the uruk-hais who kidnapped Merry and Pippin. There was something off with the face mask. It looked as if it had a life of his own. *shudders*