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23 May 2005 @ 04:31 pm
Dear Sweet Christ.  
I -- okay. I suppose that when I watch television I find myself posting all the time because it's such a novel thing for me, but may I just say: eHarmony has *got* to go.

I've got a thing about proposals, and having been proposed to twice (albeit by complete strangers) I feel that it's fine for me to have this thing about it. There are only very certain types of proposals that I find acceptable, and I suppose that's really just in the abstract because if I was in love yadda yadda yadda, but really, I feel very strongly that 1) proposing in public is not a good idea, 2) proposing around one's family is a hostage situation, 3) televised proposals are simply cruel.

That having been said? The new eHarmony commercial wherein one of the couples gets engaged DURING THE COMMERCIAL sets off all of my internal proposal-alarms. I mean, what would you do if you proposal was something complete strangers could watch doing GOD KNOWS WHAT for months? Like, what if you happened to be in an accident and the guy who rear-ended you was just that morning sitting naked in his living room eating a fruitsical and lancing his boils, watching you get engaged? You'd never know! You'd live in a constant state of vague anxiety wondering if this person knew who you were and that you were engaged!

And God help you if the engagement goes sour, or if you get married and things don't go well, because then people might stop you in the supermarket and ask, "So when's the wedding?" and you'll have to say to COMPLETE STRANGERS "Oh, we broke up" and won't *that* be a painful situation?

Or, and this certainly isn't worse, but is maybe equally as bad, what if the engagement turns out to be frustratingly long and you want to just get married and get it over with but he's stringing you along, and having just given you the ring to keep you, and your commercial is still playing and while he's out with the boys on a Saturday night, you're home alone crying into your Schlitz as you watch yourself get proposed to, your past-self filled with hopes and starry eyed dreams of a June wedding when in reality all you got was a ring and a commercial?!

Clearly it's just a terrible idea, and I'll have you all know that if any of you should ever propose to me in a commercial, I'll run out of the room and possibly avoid you for the rest of my life. Just be aware.
 
 
Current Mood: curiouscurious
Current Music: young frankenstein
 
 
 
What the hell is up with the mummy?!: ew! sarahserialkarma on May 23rd, 2005 08:41 pm (UTC)
I feel very strongly that 1) proposing in public is not a good idea, 2) proposing around one's family is a hostage situation,

Dude, you are so not wrong. When I was in Vegas a couple years ago my friends and I went up the Eiffel Tower at the Paris hotel. It's a half-scale replica of the real Eiffel Tower, which means you and about 25 other people are shuffling around each other in four narrow little passageways, surrounded by a big metal fence with little tiny viewing windows like the arrow slits in medieval castles. And my friends and I are inching our way around a corner to go stand in line for the elevator and there's this large extended family milling around right near us, getting in each other's and everybody else's way, and all of a sudden this relatively young guy hands my roommate his disposal camera, asks her to take a picture or two, and then promptly drops down on one knee in front of his girlfriend and proposes to her in front of her parents, her grandparents, nieces, nephews, and assorted strangers, some of whom are enthralled and some whom (raises hand) would really like to be anywhere else and don't know where to look but feel bad for staring.

Talk about a hostage situation. The poor girl looked as embarrassed as the rest of us to be there.
when she smiles it's like a revelation: She Thinks I'm Cute!fox1013 on May 23rd, 2005 08:55 pm (UTC)
*sullenly crosses "propose to Nif on TV" off to-do list*
the opposite of batmanpearl_o on May 23rd, 2005 09:21 pm (UTC)
Dude, why buy the cow when you can get the boar's leg for free?
Adoable Frunklyra_sena on May 24th, 2005 03:59 am (UTC)
This made me laugher harder than is medically safe.
BUT HARRY STYLES: GET GIRLY by tararestrella30 on May 23rd, 2005 11:42 pm (UTC)
if any of you should ever propose to me in a commercial, I'll run out of the room and possibly avoid you for the rest of my life. Just be aware.

Well fuck.

*sighs heavily and figures out a NEW proposal idea*
Teeny Gozerteenygozer on May 23rd, 2005 11:49 pm (UTC)
I was all hyped up to see Monster in Law, which would mark Jane Fonda's return to films. Then I saw a clip or two, and I knew it would be stupid and not worth my attention. In one of the clips, the guy (who's not supposed to be a jerk, but a great guy) proposes to the J-lo character with his mother sitting right there at the dinner table with them, on her other side. Who would do that???
Adoable Frunk: good of the podlyra_sena on May 24th, 2005 12:32 am (UTC)
I -- just -- *sighs*. This is what happens when you're left unattended. You're like the fizz that explodes from a shaken soda can.

Resonantresonant8 on May 24th, 2005 12:54 am (UTC)
I once had a co-worker who would get this very unhappy look when anyone asked about her engagement ring, and the story finally came out that her boyfriend had proposed to her in a restaurant with both their mothers at the table. So I read what you said about the hostage situation and said, Yes!

Of course, if he's that kind of person, it's just as well to know it before you marry him -- I mean, God knows what he'd do if he was ready for a baby and you weren't.
pure FORESHADOWING: Clark RHPSnifra_idril on May 24th, 2005 03:43 am (UTC)
Of course, if he's that kind of person, it's just as well to know it before you marry him -- I mean, God knows what he'd do if he was ready for a baby and you weren't.

Dear GOD what a terrifying thought. Can't you just imagine? Breakfast in bed...and booties and a pregnancy test right next to the orange juice.

You: "...honey?"

Him: "I've been up since six building the crib! Your father's coming by around two this afternoon to help make a mobile!"

You: "But I'm not pregnant!"

Him: "Not yet!"

*shudders a lot*