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28 October 2005 @ 08:21 pm
Ghosts, Ghouls, Zombies!!  
Listen, I don't care if you believe in ghosts or don't but just go with me on this one and hypothetically assume that you believe in ghosts and then answer me this question:

If you were to be locked in a room with a violent and angry ghost that has proved itself capable of causing real physical harm to people, and you are alone in the dark with said ghost, would you feel that it was a good idea to taunt it? Because certainly, I would not.

My response would probably be something along the lines of, "So. You're...I'm just going to sit here, and you go on about your invisible life, invisibly and hey, if you don't like women, that's cool, I can just sew a little, ghost, sometimes I don't like women, too, and I'll just be going, good luck in all your haunting endeavors."

Instead, in the show I'm watching right now, people are egging the damned thing on. "Come on and get us," they're saying, and honestly, I'm on the fence about the whole ghost thing. Sometimes I believe in ghosts as I have been trained to do by my family, and nod knowingly and speak of 'spooks' and all like that, but then more often I'm at one with my Scullyside, and feel like most of this shit is either stuntwork or somatizing.

This is all beside the point. The point is that whether this is staged or not, it makes absolutely no sense. "Big bad mean ghost, I'm not afraid fo you ---*television turns on by itself* OH GOD MOTHER!!!"

Furthermore, why is it that television 'mediums' or 'psychics' have this wonderful habit of speaking in the most sweeping generalizations you'll ever here? "I'm picking up something here, there's an energy with us, maybe a person, maybe not, maybe an adult, maybe not -- their name could be something ending in a vowel, or maybe not. It's possible this is the energy of a person who is dead" and things like that; John Edwards (not the vice presidential candidate, and did anyone else have difficulty with that back in the day? *sniffs sadly about the ghoulish election*) is the most guilty of that of anyone I've ever seen. His show is sort of an excercize in him saying things that could apply to anyone, everyone, or no one, and do so in a way that he can then present as being what he what he meant.

But the thing mainly about the television/haunted places psychics is this: if I was psychic and there was a possibility of me 'melding' or whatever with the spirit of a horrible killer ghost, then the absolute last place you'd ever find me would be in a haunted place! Seriously -- maybe I'd spend more time looking at babies and smiling pleasantly at their baby thoughts, but never ever would I go into a haunted house. At most, if neccesary, I'd walk in, look around, point at the haunted room, say "Don't go in there," and that'd be it.

These people try to channel murderers through their brains! Remember, people, we're not arguing about the possibility of that happening - we're just assuming that they can, and we're judging the strangeness of the choice to do that, okay? Be with me on this. Think about it a little, it'd be like...turning your supposed metaphysical power into a coffee filter for evil or something, which, to me, seems like it could only be an unpleasant experience.

But perhaps lucrative? *strokes chin thoughtfully*

That's not the point though. The point is this: thank god I'm not a psychic upon which the spiritual cleansing of whole families/buildings/castles relies upon, because I'd probably fuck that up left right and center by freaking out and running away, which, I will reiterate, seems to be the only sensible reaction.

See, with zombies, people don't egg them on, and yes, yes, I do realize we've strayed into the entirely beyond the realm of the possible area here, but I'm just saying: Zombies command respect. Zombies are better than ghosts. Zombies are NUMBER ONE!!!!
 
 
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Adoable Frunklyra_sena on October 29th, 2005 12:25 am (UTC)
...

BABY THOUGHTS. *Chokes*

that is all.

(KEEP THE ZOMBIES AWAY FROM ME)

for the record, I would RUN LIKE HELL.
Greeking the Textlipsum on October 29th, 2005 02:11 am (UTC)
I bet babies think about breasts a lot.
κάτι τρέχει στα γύφτικα: tongue_inbetween_ on October 29th, 2005 12:52 am (UTC)
Zombies? Pshaw, no way. All poll results show that ninja's beat them by far. Or Zombie Pirate Ninjas, but zombies as such? Too slow *nods*
peeps wanna see peeps boinkmusesfool on October 29th, 2005 01:14 am (UTC)
Pirate Monkey Zombie Ninjas are the way to go.
κάτι τρέχει στα γύφτικα: iwantmyinbetween_inbetween_ on October 29th, 2005 11:06 am (UTC)
How could I forget the monkeys - fly, monkeys, fly!
peeps wanna see peeps boink: crazymusesfool on October 29th, 2005 01:14 am (UTC)
BRAINS! BRAINS!

I love your crazy BRAINS!
pure FORESHADOWING: CRAZY EYES!nifra_idril on October 29th, 2005 01:52 am (UTC)
My brains are 100 percent unadulterated by the residual energies of violent angry dead people, so you can rest easy loving them. Mmmmmm, brains.
Seperisseperis on October 29th, 2005 02:12 am (UTC)
For the record, I'm with you on that. Keep in mind I'm an utter *coward*. If I were a psychic, i'd probably spend quality time under my bed and refusing to *ever turn off the lights* ever. Id' have the scariest electric bills ever.

I just love your brain. My brain wants to buy it chocolate. Good stuff, too, not Hersheys.
nif: shortbusjennifus on October 29th, 2005 03:30 am (UTC)
Did you ever see the episode of South Park where they make fun of John Edwards? They point out his fabulous generalizational skills, a lot, and then he wins the "Biggest Douche of the Universe" award.

And... yeah. People who try to engage creepy haunted things are st00pid with TWO 00, that's how stupid.

*shuts up now*