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31 January 2006 @ 12:33 pm
I am feeling fiesty.  
So. The thing is this: I literally absolutely have no choice about laundry anymore. I don't have the money to go buy new socks and underwear so I can keep going for a while (shuttup, we've all done it), and it's reached epic proportions. It's just that laundry is my most hated of all chores. I know you all know this. I know I have said this many more times than perhaps one should. I just shudder even thinking about doing it, and it's dumb, I know it's dumb, but really. I have hate in my heart for laundry. Hate in my heart.

Things I haven't talked about recently:
1. Ioan Gruffudd: Still totally retardedly sexy.
2. Bears: Stephen Colbert agrees with me -- they're a danger to national security.
3. Zombies: The most American of all horror movie monsters.

Things I would like to say to this month:
1. Fuck off, February.
2. No, really, February, I want you to feel free to go straight to hell as soon as you want to, or mostly just right fucking now.
3. If the world could stop blabbering on and on and on about love? I'd appreciate it, thanks ever so.

This is not to say that I'm anti-love, or even a real curmudgeon but I really hate the vomitous mass of heart shaped frilly things that get shoved down my throat in February, and the way that it's completely impossible to listen to the radio with someone, anyone, informing you immediately that you and your "honey" should be getting ready for a snuggle fest of epic proportions, with nose rubbing, and wine and flowers and chocolate and jewelry and stuffed animals and then sex on red sheets.

I like for people to be happy. I like for people to be in love. I like for people to have nice times. I mainly like for them to do these things in such a way that it is not designed to fill the entire world with a frantic, grasping need for some idealized ridiculous relationship that may or may not be right for them. Because God knows, that if I had some kind of special Valentine's day thing I'd probably be all weird and anxious about it and wish instead that me and whoever were on a couch somewhere, watching The Night of the Living Dead, and eating ramen in our regular clothes and arguing about the relative merits of various Alan Moore comics.

But in conclusion: Fuck you, February.

Things I would like my creativity to comprehend:
1. It's really not okay to not wake up from the nice little rest you've given yourself at this point.
2. You're killing me with your absence, creativity. Killing me.

Ultimate point of post:

James Lipton sucks cocks in hell.
 
 
Current Mood: mischievousmischievous
 
 
 
tried to eat the safe banana: Huh?thefourthvine on February 2nd, 2006 04:32 am (UTC)
James Lipton sucks cocks in hell.

I feel stupid for asking this, but - who is James Lipton? Or, more specifically, why does he suck cocks in hell? I checked him out on the IMDb, and he doesn't seem to have any really shameful, Nazi Cannibal Serial Killer White House Spokesman type roles on there. And, you know, I feel it's my personal responsibility to keep tabs on everyone who is sucking cocks in hell, because I figure that's who we'll be writing FF about once I'm down there, so...um. Wherefore the infernal cocksucking?
pure FORESHADOWING: Bobcatitude!nifra_idril on February 2nd, 2006 04:41 am (UTC)
He interviews actors on this show called "The Actor's Studio" and he's an utterly smug, pretentious, pompous bearded slug of a man. But he's still famous, and he makes lots of money and all he does is sit there and describe movie performances as though they were aged cheese and fine wine when in reality he's talking about freakin' Big Momma's House or something.

I have a lot of hostility toward him, for no real reason. I just do. But he sucks cocks in hell anyway. Honestly.
pete and gabe's collaborative dicks: ioan smolderinlovewithnight on February 2nd, 2006 04:38 am (UTC)
I saw this post on friendsfriends and just had to stop in to say...

1. Ioan Gruffudd: Still totally retardedly sexy.

Word. ::uses appriate icon of retarded sexiness::
What the Monkey?svilleficrecs on February 2nd, 2006 04:51 am (UTC)
Things I would like to say to this month:
1. Fuck off, February.
2. No, really, February, I want you to feel free to go straight to hell as soon as you want to, or mostly just right fucking now.
3. If the world could stop blabbering on and on and on about love? I'd appreciate it, thanks ever so.


Is it okay that that little list made me totally love you?

Also, I don't think it's really a celebration of love so much as it's a scheme by the red and pink metallic cardboard industries.
suzycatsuzycat on February 2nd, 2006 06:01 am (UTC)
I have a total score for V Day. You see, in my 41 years, I have been in a relationship on Valentine's Day exactly *three times*. The last one being last year, and the first in a gap of like 16 years or so. Every other year, a tiny bit of me has wondered - will this be the year that I turn out to have a sekrit admirer who is gonna be the one that saves me and my wonderwall etc.

So this V Day, single again for about a month, I will be going to a cute friend's mad giddy romantic probably illadvised wedding, with some gal pals. It will be completely FUN and with new people, along with old and trusted ones, and I won't have to sit home thinking "alas and woe".
delicate_sass: realitydelicate_sass on February 2nd, 2006 11:50 am (UTC)
I totally agree with you on the V-day stuff. I have a boy, but all the pink and red and implications that if you don't get roses or a diamond or at least something expensive he doesn't really love you? Piss me the hell off.

One of us cooks dinner, the other dessert, and we buy a new video game and play it together for hours. Simple, and I think much better than diamonds.
millysdaughtermillysdaughter on February 2nd, 2006 02:35 pm (UTC)
The thing is this: I literally absolutely have no choice about laundry anymore. I don't have the money to go buy new socks and underwear so I can keep going for a while (shuttup, we've all done it), and it's reached epic proportions. It's just that laundry is my most hated of all chores. I know you all know this. I know I have said this many more times than perhaps one should. I just shudder even thinking about doing it, and it's dumb, I know it's dumb, but really. I have hate in my heart for laundry. Hate in my heart.

Laundry I actually enjoy--it is washing dishes and cleaning the bathroom that put me over the edge. So my laundry gets done, but my bathroom gets put off until it reaches that point your laundry is at right now. (And it is just not possible to go out and just buy a nice clean new bathroom--I checked) Too bad you live so far away, or we could trade off chores.
Which might be the answer for you--if you find out that somebody you know feels that way, you could actually offer to trade off chores with them?