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12 May 2005 @ 03:23 am
It's 3 AM, and I'm still awake, and so is my work. Lucky me.  
So the right thing for me to do is clearly a poll. About zombies. (Forgive me, Lyra.)

Poll #492327 In the event of zombies.

If I woke up and there were zombies everywhere, I would:

Drink heavily. Lock myself in a bathroom with chips and booze, and drink heavily until it all went away.
Get pro-active. Kill the brain, kill the ghoul!
Try to figure out if I'd recently taken a hallucinogenic until I was dragged through a window, and then start screaming. Like, a lot.
Go fetal, clutching my cell phone and listening to the busy sound from 911 until it all went away or someone finally picked up.

Best weapon?

Fire, damn you, fire!
A gun. Clearly. As long as you've got lots of ammo, it'll be like shooting clay, brain eating, pigeons.
Cricket bat. It worked for Shaun of the Dead, okay?
Monster truck!! Style points, plus ability to get away. If the roads aren't blocked off. Which they might be. You never know.

In a zombie movie scenario, I think that you, Nifra, would:

die first, because, please. Just think about it, okay? You, zombies? Death is incipient.
make it a third of the way through the movie, and be the death that raises the stakes so that everyone knows that, OH GOD IT COULD HAPPEN TO THEM.
totally be the climactic death scene that brings a tear to everyone's eye, and gives the hero momentum to make it through. You'd be the Gipper!
survive! You're a perky ingenue!

Zombies are funny!

God yes! Single mindedness and total lack of brain! They remind me of hilarious people I know, but people who are only hilarious from afar! Up close, they try to eat your brain.
No, no, a thousand times, no! I am Lyra, and I say thee nay, zombies!!
I have no zombie opinion. You need to really maybe think about your work, there, Captain Crazy Pants.

This is a semi-serious question that I'm folding into the zombie-addled mix here. But. In regards to the way I have been locked into essay writing mode, the question is, Do you guys read them? Do you enjoy them? Should I stop?

I totally read your ship/character essays, and find them insightful, you needer of validation, you.
I read them, though they're long and rather addled, and even though lots of them are deeply flawed and again, way with the too long, I find them marginally interesting.
I don't click cut tags when they're on your journal, Nif. You have no idea what could be lurking beneath that cut tag. It could be a manatee in drag, or an ode to Otto Van Bismark's mustache. Either is possible.
I've read them, and think you way need to lay off the ego, kiddo.
Hold up, hold up, you write *essays*? What the hell? Why?
I'm here strictly for porn.


They happen sometimes.
Much like fish. But without gills. And rather more insistent on eating brains.
Would you please, please GOD, never mention zombies again? I mean, for me?
Current Mood: flirtyflirty
Current Music: I'll Fly Away-Alison Kraus
when she smiles it's like a revelation: Fox - Newbiefox1013 on May 12th, 2005 02:20 pm (UTC)
I was talking zombies to like SIX PEOPLE yesterday. Awesome.

That said, zombies are nothing like fish.

Fish are SCARY.
the opposite of batmanpearl_o on May 12th, 2005 02:43 pm (UTC)
The fact that Lyra doesn't like zombies makes me even sadder than her weird <<3 antipathy.