December 20th, 2004

ew bitch - crazyperfume

Dear Yuletide Story,

I have kicked your ass, you recalcitrant bastard, and you are done. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, HUH!?


Ass kickingly yours,



So, I rewatched rotk today, because really, sometimes you just have to. And the thing is, that movie is filled with terrifying, terrifying vaginas.

You're sitting there thinking, "Isn't there, like, one female character if you add Eowyn, Galadriel and Arwen together?"

But the thing is -- vagina imagery? EVERYWHERE. And all of it is just horrifying. Shelob's little pincer thing? MOST HORRIFYING VAGINA IN THE HISTORY OF EVER OMIGOD.


Also, PS? If I was given a ring of power and told to carry it to Mount Doom and destroy it in the fiery furnaces after months of risking my life to protect it and being delirious from lack of food and orc-rape? I'd decide to keep the damn thing too. There, there, Frodo. *pets him*

Oh, and lastly: My love for Sam is a love that is so strong it can CUT THROUGH WALLS OF LEAD.

That is all.
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