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pure FORESHADOWING
Okay, so before I talk about Faith, even, I want to talk about why it is that I have issues writing any Jossverse. Because I really, truly do. I always feel apologetic, and as though I should preface each story/thought about the Jossverse with a disclaimer that states that I really don't *know* the characters, I've just seen every episod of every Whedon show, and have thought about them somewhat, but don't really *know* them.

It's not because I feel like I can't do the witty repartee dialogue. It's not because I don't think I can understand the deep underlying levels of frustration that exist for so many of the Jossverse characters. It's definitely even some bizarro protest of how he takes so many female characters and breaks them down to utter despair or caricatures of their former selves (or, in the context of Angel, just straight up kills them off). I mean, come on, he does that to the men, too (and I am way going to be bitter over poor Wesley for say, EVER. And Lindsey, too. Damn it.).

It's not even new-fandom shyness. Though, you know, there's certainly some of that (because it hits me like an anvil every time, you guys).

What it is, I think, is that there are so many specialists. Which is silly, when you think about it, because that's true of everybody who's fandom monogamous -- they're specialists in certain characters, certain shows, they've got the whoel atmosphere down COLD, you know? But for whatever reason BtVS and AtS and even Firefly (to an extent) feel to me like it's filled with people who live in the skin of the characters, and do so in a really vehement way, and like, make a fandom life of it. I feel like I have to apologize because I dabble.

And again? I realize this is silly. But I feel that way. I find myself whining over IM to fox1013 that I can't write about Faith because I don't *KNOW* Faith, and I don't *KNOW* Lilah or Wesley.

In other fandoms, the amount of time I've spent thinking about those characters would be equivalent to me being entirely comfortable with them, feeling very confident writing them. In Jossverse, I feel like this isn't true.

And I honestly have no rational explanation for this. I don't know if I'm the only one who does this. But I do.

So that all having been said, and hilariously enough, it's the disclaimer I was talking about wanting to write all the time when I consider Jossverse, let's get this show on the road.

Well, I guess it would be nice, if I could touch your body...: I don't say Faith is hot every ten seconds, but I do spend a lot of time wallowing in explanations for why I love her so very, very deeply. Collapse )
 
 
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pure FORESHADOWING
05 May 2005 @ 12:19 pm
Vin Diesel was the real creator of Spawn, not Todd McFarlane. In fact, Vin Diesel IS Spawn, and using his awesome hell powers, he thought up the greatest sci-fi movies ever, including Alien, Blade Runner, and Terminator. He also starred in all of them, as both the main characters and as the monsters, and his favorite roles were those of Newt, the Alien Queen, Pris, and John Connor, while simultaneously impregnating all the supposed people who played the above-mentioned roles, and causing all of them to give birth to their own grandchildren, because his semen is really Red Bull energy drink.

Vin Diesel will kill you, your whole family, all your friends and burn your damn house down if you don't write his name in bold.

Vin Diesel is the third Olsen twin.

Vin Diesel occasionaly wears live rattlesnakes as a condoms.

Vin Diesel knows what it's like when doves cry.

Vin Diesel was the leading agent for the Bay of Pigs fiasco, and would have pulled it off even without air support, had Castro not challenged Diesel to a game of Spades. Diesel easily won, but was too late to save the invasion, and so he is haunted by the ghosts of dead Cuban revolutionaries.

Vin Diesel can cut 2" thick steel piping using only his rectum and Beatrice Arthur.

Today's lesson brought to you by Patrick Swayze, Paul Gross, the letter 'Vin' and this informational website. <"/font">
 
 
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pure FORESHADOWING
It's hot out, and they've taken their shirts off. They're drinking beer, and staring down at the engine of a big, red, glossy car. You know, the kind that's so old school it looks something like an alligator because of the grill in the front. They're covered in muscles and sweat, and they're growling at one another, eye to eye behind their sunglasses. And then Dom puts his hands on Brian's hips, slams him back against the wall, and bites his shoulder, hard. Brian just moans, and arches his neck, working a hand between them --

Yeah? Was that hot for you guys, too? Good. Because that's Dom/Brian in a nutshell.

Brian/Dom: Oh, come on, like so much gay porn isn't actually about incredibly muscled butch men, reclining on cars with an ecstatic look on their face as they work open their entirely too-tight jeans. This movie's so gay that even the premise must have come from the studios of Gay, Gay, and Gayer productions.Collapse ).

Why do I love this pairing? Because they could live together, spend all morning talking about cars, never once put the toilet paper on the roll, eat the kind of food that doesn't bear speaking of, drink beer, watch the game, and end up fucking on the carpet in front of the television, and afterward, maybe Dom would give Brian a noogie until Brian agreed to do the laundry, and they'd fall asleep with Dom's big hand lazily rubbing over Brian's back, and Brian's face pressed into Dom's shoulder.

Because they are entirely fascinated by one another, drawn to one another with a pull that's undeniable. The issues here are power and control and belonging and need, and they're all hidden under this layer of testosterone that makes things a little more interesting. Plus. Hi. They're hot. *coughs about her own superficiality*

I'm still taking calls for pairings/characters you all want me to talk about here.

Previous essays: Arthur/Lancelot: A Winter Love, Chloe/Lana: A Fragile Orbit, Faith (and Faith/Buffy: I guess it would be nice if I could touch your body.
 
 
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